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Just breathe.

Just Breathe
Tue, 07/05/2016 - 14:29 -- ajbrown9

Just breathe.

Darling close your eyes and fill your lungs

This ladder of life you're climbing

Take it rung by rung.

When you feel like you are falling apart,

Take one hand and put…

Bill Withers - Just The Two Of Us (Lyrics)

Bill Withers - Just The Two Of Us (Lyrics)

Those Winter Sundays - For my children when you start to think for your selves, and not from her or them.

Those Winter Sundays -- Sundays too my father got up early
and put his clothes on in the blueblack cold,
then with cracked hands that ached
from labor in the weekday weather made
banked fires blaze. No one ever thanked him.

I’d wake and hear…

Posting this hear, the letter I sent to my daughter on her 18th Birthday.

To my daughter on her 18th Birthday.

I was stunned and in awe of your birth. I remember us reading your first children’s bible in AZ on the same couch we still have. We all had to take turns reading because you just absorbed it all. I remember mom and I teaching you whatever music we could. Whether it was you sitting with me at the Piano or using the baby musical items. You were such an observant baby and still are. But now as you grow into the magnificent adult you are today; I am still stunned and in awe of you.

I watched as you grew and enjoyed life. The many friends you have had, all the adventures we took you on. Mom and I never wanted to leave you out and we always wanted to take you with us on every adventure. You loved every minute of it.
We took you to restaurants with us. You worked with Grandpa Larry, Uncle Chris on our projects in AZ. You even helped at the house with projects.
I want to encourage your artistic talents. I knew you had a great talent there as well as I taught you the ways of the brush, of thought and who God is.
You took to the Piano right away (surprise lol) and again were so talented at that. Then you picked up the Guitar. I will never forget your duet with mom and you telling me you wanted to finger the strings and just not do cords. And as always, I reminded you of that classic scene in “The little Red Engine that could” and made a whistle blowing motion to you. Choo Choo
I remember our 6 years with VeneCraft and your uncanny abilities to adapt and overcome whatever obstacle was presented to you. Your never give up, never surrender attitude is a quality only God can give and will carry you through everything. Your ability to handle situations, tournaments, semantics, scheduling, skills, planning, construction, creating, and adaptivity blew me away. Your completion of the DeathMaze, just further proof.
When you took up an interest in singing, you had your mother’s gift. Your mothers voice has been an immense blessing to me since I met her. She stumbled a lot with self-confidence, and I was there every step to bolster and encourage. I pray/hope you meet someone that does the same for you. Your mothers voice and love are like an angel.
At an early age at the first Martial Arts School, you encountered what it was to have mental fortitude. We moved you on to the Shaolin Martial Arts School in Hightstown were your extreme Talent in the Art started to show. Your instructors were always telling me, wow, just wow.

Everyone you would meet would always be in a better place to having met you. You are a blessing to be around, a joy to talk to, and an inspiration to what will be.
It has been a miracle to see you come into this world and a bigger miracle to have been part of your life. I look forward to the awesome person and blessing to the world you will become. God Bless you and I Love you.

With much Love and blessings,

Dad

Nia,
I am sorry things are the way they are. I miss seeing you and being part of your life. I miss seeing your bright smiling face and spunky attitude. I miss your dedication and commitment to what is true and just. I miss you being my Bu and all the time we snuggled.
I have learned that I should not have been so harsh and demanding over the years. But as a dad, I saw what was best for each of you and where you needed to be going. Giving you something you could be proud of for the rest of your life. I learned about myself I should have been more fun and loving.
If I could change something, I would have made sure to laugh a lot more with you, to enjoy life more with you and participated more in your life.
I miss watching you grow, mature and turn into an exceptionally fine adult. I miss playing games and hearing your voice and talking about all the different dynamics in the world. I miss your smile and laughter. I miss helping with your troubles. Most of all I miss your hugs and being close to you.
I have missed greatly the holidays that have gone by and the time missed being with you. I hope I do not miss another moment in time. I hope I do not miss another Birthday, holiday, life event to admire the fine human you have become.
We have a lot of good times and a lot of good laughs as I pass through the photos. I miss watching you grow. I miss all the times we had fun. I am sorry for my failures; I did the best I knew how under the circumstances. I wish I could have done better. I dedicated my entire life and would do it all over again a thousand times. You are just that important to me.
I love you greatly, I miss you,
Love,
DAD.

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To my Son Vito who is being forced to grow up suddenly. I have no doubt in you and I love you.

--

Vito,

I know I have been so hard on you during your life. It was so important to me that u learn how great your responsibility it is to the people that will be with you. The mental, physical, and spiritual toughness u must endure to be a helpful servant and to endure the hard ships and trials that will come your way. The rock that u must become for all others, and finally a family I hope u will have.

U must become immovable, a mountain to them to endure and support all trials and horrors that come their way, and yours. Unyielding, unbending, a constant guiding light.

At times I have failed u and have failed our family and I will always regret that. But we all make mistakes and I pray when u do make mistakes, those who love u truly will forgive u and help u back up so u can continue to stand for them. You are absolutely without a doubt an amazing son whom I am so proud of. You are so talented in so many things and you have such a big heart. I have seen many times through our trials and heart aches, u still chose to be kind, to be supportive of others, to stand up for those less fortunate; you are a true hero of the people for that.

During the most troublesome of trials, we had to endure we find out what we are made of and in that we find what great strength of character we have and how helpful we can be to others. You have such a big heart and kind soul I hope u find the immense power to help others with that. You are so bright and so full of happiness and laughter u r a bright shining light to all around you (although your tough exterior shows otherwise..aka Mr. Ice). I have seen that in the many pictures of you and your friends, they all look to you for guidance.

Your intellect is something else to behold. I have told you in secret about it and I hope you hold that closest to your heart and for God. You have been gifted with everything I was and am both physically and mentally and I pray you stay the true course.

I hope that you find your way, to grab a hold of your soul and realize who you are and be proud of your light and your purity. Do not be swayed by the impurities of this world and remain true to God. Forgive yourself, forgive others and in doing so you will find immense power to do so much good for this world.

Love,

Dad

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Singing this to you Juliette Dee -

Bill Withers - Just The Two Of Us (Lyrics)

Purity of love

Purity of love

The Starman's Realm

The Starman's Realm

DNA seen through the eyes of a coder (or, If you are a hammer, everything looks like a nail)

DNA seen through the eyes of a coder (or, If you are a hammer, everything looks like a nail)

Kalidasa

Kalidasa

Lily the Snowman

Lily the Snowman

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